no one is pefect ｡◕‿◕｡

well ... just gonna rant about ex again xD

hmmm ... lemme see . i'm just looking for someone who is brave , gentle , romantic and pampers me . xDD is that so perfect ? LOL .

first ex - gentle but not romantic ...
second - unknown . romantic maybe but violent .
3rd - gentle , cute but kinda ... null . = =
4rd - romantic , gentle , pampers me BUT playboy , cheater and girlish .
5th - romantic , gentle , cute , pampers me and brave BUT a dangerous playboy and cheater .
6th - romantic , gentle , cute but coward and like to pout like girls = = .
7th - romantic , gentle , cute but coward .
8th - unknown . cute .
9th - mysterious . brave .
10th - gentle , cute , romantic but dangerous playboy .
11th - romantic , gentle , brave ... but is just lacking of something > < .
etc[forgot xD ] .

*sigh ~ well have a great day ~ ｡◕‿◕｡

from the last post until 30/10/2010 .

hmm lately ... is messing a bit . exam still going on , my last subject is on next monday , thats Pengajian Perniagaan K2 . felt like typing all the things had been on my mind lately but forgot D:

2 until 3/11/10 going to johor and s'apore . 4th will be at s'apore for about 8hours . 5th/11/10 will be back :D and 2nd sis is having wedding-ceremony-tea or whatever its called .

so ... my question is .. .what is friend ? why am i always the one being ignored ? what does i love you mean ? oh ... i had been typing with lots of space lately . and more formal with a "."

when i put a fullstop , it means i dont want to talk to you [before] but i realize its neat :D and if i said bye to you means i dont really care about you [ except for classmates ] of course i had said bye bye to my classmate xD

i had friends . "i love you" is repeating a lot . until now ... it doesn mean anything anymore . guys said "i love you" and then after they get her , he's busy . poor girl ... she is not a doll Dx

i'll open my eyes AFTER i'm 18 :D well .. before that , hurt me as much as you want :D

jya ~ thats all ~ regards , good day ~♥~

my love history ^^

hmm i think by stating all out here will make me more happy . bcoz i wanna forget it all . but if i want to rmb it . i can just read this to refresh . XD

umm .. wont tell history bout other things . just some characteristic of my beloved's ex's . XD i love and i cant hate . its torturing hating .

the first one .. standard 5 .^^ i think dont need to state name gua ?! aiya... but will forget later leh ... alrite .. his name Sam xD umm .. his relationship with me is the most complicated .

how shud i put it ? umm .. its like , standard 5 and 6 we are couple but then form 1&2 we lost contact . form 3&4 couple back . form 5 break . form 6 couple back . and in the middle of this year ... break . XD

lets see .. he was a nice guy . he was out-date the moment i met him, [frankly ok ? TT__TT hope he dont read this ler ] but then when chatting with him form 5 he was so matured and improved so muchhhh! i was like ... omg ?!

haha .. his personality that i like ... he was caring . always calling me and sms-ing me . sending me credits . well i always send back thou ... i hate owe-ing people [bad experience when i'm standard3] .

personality i dislike . he was like old man . bla bla bla . xD sometimes we dont even had a topic to chat ?!

confession : giving letter when going back from tuition class . and presents sometimes . little surprise ^^ unknown duration .same age .

but we are still friends now . i think ? XD

alright . next . oh ... this one . form 1 . his name ....... Adrian . haha. this one is easy to forget . frankly ... XD

confession : giving letter on the way we're walking back .

unforgetable moment : yelled out "i love you ah ~! " on the staircase with loads of peoples . half a year .same age .

oh .. when i said he was the easiest to forget bcoz ... we never had anything to do . rarely talk . just sms ! i'm serious . XD well ... i had a stupid habits . i hate rejecting people XD

third one .. unknown .

fourth . unknown .

fifth . this was a bit special . XD Kevin . omg.. i'm serious . he was younger than me . XD 1995 . which means 3 years younger than me .

he was cute . but always busy TT____TT the reason why i break up with him .

confession : face to face : i love you . which shock me .

rare memories . just some blank promises . 2 months .

sixth . unknown .

seventh . Mike . umm ... he is also caring and nice . but sometimes he is extremely busy . he cheated once . but then we're back together . a cat lover . very girly . = =" i cant stand that . i felt like lesbian .

his line "when u're scared , i'll ease ur mind" . althou i know thats a blank promise too . but its so sweet .

confession : unknown . XD

memories : too much . XD of 6 months .

personality - quite a pervert too XD 20 years old .

eigth .dont wanna tell .

ninth one . forgot completely = ="

tenth . Zuriel . which also given me a new name . kyriel . XD he is the sweetest among all above . but also the sly-est . sometimes even idk if he's for real or not .

"i love you" at least 5 times a day , was what he always told me . sms and phone calls everyday . but my jealousy went over . we break bcoz my jealousy is too high and his pride is high . TT_____TT

personality : sweet . caring . stubborn . sly . pervert .

confession : always hanging around . and direct confession .

memories : too much ! x3 . of 1 and a half months . same age .


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and then ?

food! XD

Today 30-08 talks bout food wit vivian and debbie .woooh..that time almost 12.30pm.
hungry like hell xD stomach already drumming.today nt even a second to emo.
the best day this month xD
My top 10 food that i want nw.
Pudding.
Honeydew[juice] or bubbletea.
Ikura.
Onigiri.
Miso soup.
Ice blended mocha/choco expresso.
Cuppucino.
Mushroom soup.
Roti canai.
Kuih[idk what its called xD]
Dim sum.
Lo mai kai. xD
And more more sweet food xD

my point of view .

Elders always think their exp is 100% righteous.nt even bother to give nwadays teenagers a FREAKING chance to explain or change.bcoz they always think 'a sinner is forever a sinner' they dont give the chance for them to change coz they're afraid to take the risk .

and they think all teenagers are the same as those rotten society rubbish.did they ever think the pressure from them is one of the cause?come on la..what century is this?

just becoz of one rubbish in society , everyone is rubbish?i stand in the point of view of the elders..yes its true .'prevention is better than cure' but please be clear that prevention is nt meant to force,putting pressure or to control them.maybe they cn just give them advices.

if it doesn work.do it slowly or to find someone expert in teenagers problems and understand the reasons behind their deeds.if u dont even have the patience or felt the responbilities then dont even care to have sex and child.once they're born , parents takes full responbilities on them!

random blogggggggy X3

well well ...

first of all .. how about talking about me ? XD emo-ing daily.. falls asleep when i'm not supposed to xD

my english had been up up up recently.. influenced by someone.. felt proud .. XD kidding..

umm guys are so bastard likey ? XD firstly then would tried to have you . later when they get you , they'll try to dump u ..

aiya forgot what i'm about to tell .. .-. geeeeeee... fine~ just gonna spill out everything on this blog again later~ if i rmb~ =D

o_0

no title as usual ler...xD
err.. this diary is actually for me to rant.
xp
errr.. woot a long time since i last update hor ?

ok to the point..
so start off with *cough cough ... he always said give him a chance... now he gave up so .. i still owe him one .. and i think i paid it just now . yep .its not like i hate him or something... just that ..he is too good xD i truly wish him happiness (^^,)

second off .. =) someone ... who always said "love" without meaning it.someone who always rant to me . someone whose jealousy is very HIGH . yes so damn f-ing high ! when i'm with a guy he would get jealous but FYI my jealousy level is darn xxxx f-ing high too .when he is with another girl , its called "GENTLEMAN" WTF dude ?!

dont make me laugh ... he think i dont know that .. i'm a good stalker xp
he is a liar , someone with high jealousy , and many more. that make us even . but its he did it first and i just PAY BACK . its called SELF PROTECT . okay ?

and i can count everything about him . althou he is good to me.. but that is what everyone can be to me.

negative points .
he loved cat.. oh come on ! that makes me felt like lesbian ..
obsessive with new stuff.. i cant help u on that u know ?!
he called me out / chat to me when he is bored. darn .. i'm not a f-ing-shitty
-doll for u to play with !
and etc .. zzz!
thats all .

*yawn ...
doing PP hmwork .. will sleep later after some game ^^ nite nite~

oh one more..sorry for the foul language i used... i'm in a very shitty mood ! TC~

today~

woah long time no go tesco liao..usually go kinrara's giant / seri kembangan jusco de.so update hor the tesco...haha~ SELF SERVICE... >.> i need to pack everything myself... zha dao...

actually today go 2 place de.go itu...kuchai lama[ i dont know la..the place got carefour there...my sense of direction damn low ] got a supermarket named "the store" damn lousy...the price damn mahal... that rice 49.99 ..tesco 40.99 >.> wth...

then go tesco ... actually want buy rice and sugar oni but hor... take take take until rm350+ liao.
@_@

zha dao...wah tesco changed so much leh..since the last time i visit there...want take a free card~ but no bring ic~ TT^TT aiyo go jalan jalan why need bring ic leh~ >.>

then hor...at the counter...the cashier look at me and gave me evil grin...i din look her at the face..then she said something [ my ears got problem one.. >.> ] i din hear so ignore her..then she said something to my father...

my father told me "hey she said she know u oh" ... i was like " har?" then i looked at her face...ohhhh...looks familiar but 0.00% of memory for her.@_@

who are you? i think i know her...but no memory at all.. [ FYI my memory is low too ^^" ]

tuition friend?classmate?or even schoolmate?haiz...i could forget someone in 3 month time if i din see/keep in contact with a certain person...i think this malay girl is form 1 or 2 de friend la..coz form 3+4+5 i think i can rmb de..

or maybe she transfer to other school de...? @_@ suan le~ but meeting old friend is nice~ what a nice feeling~ althou i dont rmb her~ but she seems like a nice one~ ^^

today...jpj test D'X

so...go there by 12pm.then wait wait then test then wait again then test ...zzz... total... test = 1 hour.wait = 6 hours.....wth.....

then ... naik bukit...wahhh @_@ so beautiful ... i also cant believe myself pass it first round =D used 1 minute *sweat*

hehe very happy .. then parking.. also beautiful~~this one okay lar~~

then.........the stupid three-point-turn...ahh this one ...after enter...all beautiful...then the stupid car dont wanna move after i lepas klaj o_0;; arggg...used 2 minute~

oh i fail at......erm...when reverse.....i forgot to change to gear1 and the car move back 1cm or move a bit...then FAIL! what the... haiz fail IS fail .. (｡＞0＜｡) blame the car~ then when back still need be sardine~ 10 student in one answer [<-- a car's name] >.>

10 student...1 pass...1 fail parking...8 fail three point turn =D

argggggg~!! next time i thought just test back the three point turn only ... but i need to test ALL [ hill,parking and three point turn!]

hmph...then my money~~~~~~~~ TT^TT

oh on the road... 16/20...pass =D hehe...when doing round'bout.....i duno why the car move very fast...i din press oil ah... TT^TT then the jpj start scold scold scold [ like no tomorrow *sweat*]

then me kept nod-ing...and he scold me one more "nod nod nod! [ i forgot what he said == thats something to scold me lah~ TT^TT]"

then...ah he scold me until back to the nilai centre

(｡＞0＜｡)

crazy...

omg...just now...my father phone rang...my father "what?! --- kah yan ar?" =o= why my full name? == i thought is yuen..coz in the morning i got sms and ask her something about her license..

but hor...no way she would call my father number la. >o<>
me : "hello...?" *scratching head* [and omg ... i thought he was a girl...i thought he was someone learning car with me >.>]
him : jie jie still rmb me ar? [what the...jie jie? =o=]
me : ahhh...ohhh..ummm...you are...?
him : forgot me ar?umm the one ask u for the poster..
me : ahh ohhh..umm the --------------?
him : ya..now i form - liao...
me : ohh..where did u got this phone number?
him : nehh u write in the detail for the majalah sekolah 012------- [ darn u majalah sekolah .. and when the hell did i wrote my father's number in it? wth... the privillege being a librarian --> checking other ppl's info =.=]
me : ohhhh..ahhh and then leh?
him : no la...where did u live ah? ------- ar?
me : err yala around --- la ..oiiii are u checking my background or something...?
him : no la just ask..bla bla bla...


[did i get stalked on? wth...]

and then...whats more interesting is that...after that i went and explain to my father about that phone call =.= what the...that make me looks more suspicious..oh man!what a day....

Pain..

ask me why now!! xD just kidding...when i wanted to tell nobody can stop me..when i dont want to nobody can force me ^^

aiyooo..forcing myself to be happy and smile is much more pain...almost finish watching the chinese drama [lazy wanna check the english name&dont know how to type chinese name xD]..oh well...

its "koon sam gai" [cantonese] gai~not kai~ayam xD!! edited 8:53PM ..the name is 宮心計 "beyond the realm of conscience".

reli agree with the -bitch- [sorry i used foul word.ignore it,if u dont like.xD] .yea that xxxxx.

that xxxxx once said "why she always gets what she wants?" yea..why am i always in bad lucks?aiks..

cant express feelings is a pain feeling...who [the hell] shud i trust?who shud i get my revenge?do i do good and ppl will be good?who shud i love?who shud i hate?why is jealousy a -feelings- in this -wicked- world?

without jealousy i wont asked these question u know... ^^ and lastly...who is my friends?awww...dont pity me.. TT

if You intended let me be alone...then dont gimme -hopes- please... bcoz it hurts more when everything i planned turns out the -other- way TT sobs...

oi oi..think of all this ..main reason --> just now in the afternoon..on fb..

my friend-ei ur darling got ask u out ar?
me-no.
my friend-she asked me out yesterday oh..
me-dont tell me!!!i hate you [kidding thou xD]
my friend-fine..wanna go out saturday? [<--whats this?pity me? =____=]
me-*feels a bit annoyed and jealous TT*
my friend- bla bla bla~
me- *annoyed* [so i turn the fb chats to -offline-]

HMPH~well i'm not reli angry with her..just felt jealous TT

these days playing TinierMe..an online game but.....haiz suan le~just let it be..Que Sera Sera~

this world is so -real- hahaha!~~

Ps:the smiles&laugh above is all FAKES! thank you ! ^^ <---this one included[smiles is mean] xD <---this one is 20% real~lets be real then!

oh ya one more...i am not a spare tayar xD so dont treat me as a SUBSTITUTES~thank you ^^ <----50% real~

haiz...

the days memory so low(not these days,it always IS LOW!) grrr.haiz forgot certain person...bcoz long time no contact liao...and thus eliminate them from my life~bye bye~

but there is one person i will never forget and i will always keep in touch with her for she is one in a million... sobs...

yesterday dreamt about something..hehe forgot liao xD but i'm sure it was a nice dream ^^

hmm looking forward to this sunday~cousin's wedding..when will be your's sis? *chuckles*

haiz..promised..and broken=i hate u..i still rmb something...chemistry paper 3 was the last paper..before that paper we revise a bit and something crossed my mind..

i told the FRIENDS(close ones~ <3>

i am glad. =)

no matter what happened i shud be glad...for a lotssssss of reason.well first of all i gt the bare necessities(its a song from jungle book~very nice one~relaxed and nice rhythm~ *chuckle*)

hehe back to the topics.hehe pass my undang after reading the 220 question book the second time i FAILED.well well.i DO NOT regret.rm120 for a lesson and 2 friends.

for a lesson is when i learn that "failures makes you stronger each time u fall down and ppl gives u a kick" well? xD

and then the 2 frens...its nice...the first time met "Yan Yumiko" facebook u will find her.but not yumiko its japanese word de.she is nice...umm she pass her first time 46 i think.. =)

but she is not arrogant at all.she is a form 5 this year (2010) .and hor she lives near my house only xD so we could met up and go jalan jalan together in jusco or giant ;)

hehe then the second time i go for test.umm in bangi one.then hor i met a arrogant girl TT.she was the same age as myself but i felt stress with her due to her arrogantness.well i had patience..lol just kidding.

she failed 41/50 just like the marks i get on my first time xD her name is also kah yan but diff surname.boooo.this one i dont wan ler xD oh ya among them there are 2 malay singer la.well teenager malay singer.

the girl is pretty but the boy...they are siblings...well the first time i see the guy hor i just saw his back with long hair but the hair is kinda rough.then when i saw his face i was like ?_? ----> @@ what the...

gender bender? <=== (read manga too much xD) OMG...he din wear a skirt so he is not a crossdresser...well anyways not my business..

okay now third time !! this realy a bit sad,happy,stress,excited and annoyed lor. okay start our journey with umm..going there..waited for some girls..then naik kereta...

then in the car hor...its unser so quit spacious but at the back the sat 4 girls included me ==!!! sardin!!! the second row 2 girls and 1 chinese guy(kinda cool xD and nice~ ><) then the front is also a chinese guy~dont really rmb his face lur~

then hor...very sad is that on the way to nilai(first time go nilai take test.the 2 times is at bangi de..well nilai de very easy la the question.gt 2 same question asked "bilakah anda boleh potong kenderaan di sebelah kiri?"

i answered when the front car moves too slow xD actually its when the left car change to right side.well i shud have answered one A and one B xD i know the answer was either those two bcoz other option was craps ==!!)

oh...yea on the way to nilai hor.....very teruk la sit 4 ppl at the back TT sardin then hor the 2 girl on my left hor talk talk talk i felt like "shut up la.i need silence to read and do revision a bit" ==!! talk talk talk ALL THE WAY to nilai...one hours+ ==

what the...on my right is a chinese girl named "Yuff Len" also in my fb (story bout her later...) at first i also not so like that girl de xD (yuff len sorry ah) well she gave me an arrogant scent. TT

then while waiting we chat ...she was 12 and i was 14 lol.14 and 19 is the number i hate the most well i hate those number ended with 4 or 9.

we chat for a while and exchange name after we talk about 10 min xD then add her on my phone (hey nice leh there got wireless de~haiz if i know earlier then that kpp i also cn play fb de la xD) then the test...

then come out she make a crying face. >< .not reli cry la just make that face ler. then i asked the mr.chong "go listen undang now ar?" he said "no la so late liao la"

ok lor.balik lagi bagus i sooooo tired that time xD then hor i thought is 42/50 de but getting the receipt is 46/50 i was like "@@ siao ar?" lol.then mr.chong just rushing and said "come come quick go listen ur undang now la~run run~" ==ll

i thought listen undang second time is the same as the first time de?but exactly diff..TT so sad NOBODY told me that TT sobs. so sad to hear it alone...

well i thought like first time de so i was happy~.so sad to part with yuff len~ then enter the room 2 hor felt scare...a lot malays and indians.you could call me racist.for i had a bad experience in school (form 3. location:school block A's stair .dont ask about it.thank you.)

okay done with that.umm...then hor sat the back lor.wait wait alone.open fb and post something.sister SINDIR me ==!

then hor when the class is about to start a malay guy came over and said "kak,boleh tak duduk kat depan" i was like haiz nvm la sit where also same jeh~

btw why call me "kak"?he looked older and he got lots of gangs there TT scared... so went in front.sit in the most front!!grrr.i hate this...

the instruktor came in giving some books but duno if he din saw me or what..he din give me TT this make me so sad and pain...i felt transparent... sobs..

thinking it makes me felt sad.i endure it...for 3 hours staying in a transparent condition.felt hungry bcoz that time around 3 o'clock liao.hungry+sad+stress+angry TT

lucky me its 3 hours nia not 6.actually got a P amali de but skip that .mr chong say cn go home de bcoz that p amali is just sitting under the sun de wor xD for me ? more good la.

no need see that yong sui malay instructor anymore.hmph.hate u forever!oh ya i think due to i am late hor that class is full of seniors and those who had a car at home and who had already practice.

uggg more stress bcoz i am the only one dont know anything about car TT.what a pain...then balik lor~shocked me...back also need see that 38 po from earlier.neh the one talk talk talk de ah. aiyo...i shud have bring my hands-free along ==!! .

phone expired cannot sms. ==!! .then hor along the way of course she also talk non stop la. i wonder if she will die if she shut up? ==!! she chat with the driver(my chong) this time bcoz she sat in front.once again i sat in the middle ==

then when on the way back we visit mr chong's house.hey nice leh.he own 4 offices,4 dogs(normal dog ...) and a big house o.O that house he said every country he go he will buy a coke or other carbonate drinks for a memory~

that coke from china damn cute xD i shud have took a pic ><~ and then again balik~this time to his office when i am dropped off.the time i closed the car door hor i was like kena electric shock ?_?

what izit the aircond problem?well i sat in the middle so the air cond was kena me TEPAT lor. a bit pain only la.then wait for father.then he go buy durian~ == i hate the most...

duno why i just cant eat them.its not the scent.its when i eat i felt like vomit ... and then fullstop for yesterday~~~

oh ya there are 3 roads i hate the most.well these are the road father always used.first is of course the most used road to the shop~there is a police station there. to tell the truth i started hating POLICE from when i am form 3 =)

i hate them .i despise them.i look at EACH OF them with glare&hatred. the second road is on the way to serdang pasar~umm.there is a road hor if morning very very jam de.bcoz we are malaysian ^^

the third road is the pasar road.one the way back.that road hor sooooooooooooooo small one.eee.well i dont hate it bcoz they are pasar people ~ lol.

haiz that all la xD tired liao now also 11:54 liao.i started typing this from 11:10 :p gudnite~

rm25...rest in peace...

rofl...

what the...u see...just now in the afternoon the maid ordered a barrel of gas...then that guy come in the house!! o.O damn...then say daddy haven come back la.

then gone.just now 'round 4.30pm that guy come back...i said "boss haven come back" . ?_?

shit...then hor what make me felt like stabbing myself is...the gas seller said "then i want back the new gas barrel" then i am like "harrr?" i asked the maid "u...take their gas?" the maid nodded.

i said "give back la" . she answered "i change dy..." *faint!!!* i was like "what the...!!".why you.....haiz nvm la.rm25 please.lol.my 2008's precious collection...i usually go collect it and kept it for "emergency" use. xD

haiz but nvm la since this is also KINDA called emergency.its dangerous to let in the stranger.i was shocked when she let in that guy to my home's door. ==ll.

luckly that boss was nice.i think father is a patron of that gas seller who was a chinese.what a day!!

lol.

is "sial" count as bad word? xD

this days felt so beh song...haiz...bo mood.choose between career and study.okay fine.major? lol said also daddy wont let de la...

wanna study anime!! xD haha..my conscience told me he 99.9% wont let me de. =) .ah so bored bored.when can i grow as ADULT and get my FREEDOM . o.O

haiz.sial...hate too much.

oh plkn had started *chuckle* he went to perak~ wont miss him :p will never miss him.come back dont contact me ever again.do u know how much courage and patience i use each time i face him?lol...

nahhh.these day nothing fun...nothing nice...miss her~ <3~

then lastly~

I HATE U~

H-appy to see U
A-lways miss U so much
T-ake U in my mind
E-veryday I remember U...