weeee kyaaaa!!

so happy for yesterday ^^...stil cant forget ho high i play until...hope to see more miracle...uwahhh i love all the member,seniors and juniors too...they are frenly(well at least the member are frenly) so nice so nice...Sheryl is so nice..hehe...


yesterday was very very unexpected...my prayer has reach the LORD oh LORD thanks...so happy...i hope i wont be as sad as i am happy today bcoz usually when i happy one day it will be sad many day T.T...chak bye2..

over enjoyed...

yeah!whooohooo!rock it....today 26-9-08 i was really really happy...but there is something sad too..well the happy feeling over flow inside more than my sad feeling..i am happy...all that i pray and hoped come true thats to make sure youth conference going on perfectly and it goes on perfectly as i prayed...and JR a member i prayed so that he will be more happy and forget all the past thing that make him sad so today he seem more lively than ever..he was happy (at least what i see from outside)...


then today i "selamba"ly propose to ken ahaha...not that ken its kks..haha its actually nt propose..i told him b4 "i admire u in the beginning of skul" and that time is i think around july..and today he ask me "u like me?" haha i selamba jek answer him "yes" haha then he...aiya i forget wat reaction jor..actually i want sambung that "that feeling is now turn to admire feeling" lol admire and love is two very very very different feeling leh...


dulu i dun wan to reject him so i accept him and he break up with me...that time i feel "wah so free...less a beban" (so jahat la me) haha then after a few week i was like "wuwuwu(sfx crying) why he break up with me" haha then later i regain my self confident little only la until now...now i understand that the love i say is only some of my admire and frenship for them...aiyo why i din understand it in the first place if i understand it earlier then no one wud be hurt right?..


ya that time i am stil mentah...since he was so precious to me up until now i stil be fren back with him..haha very unexpected...and today i thought i as a member has no present but i get a t-shirt wah so happy thats the second gift i receive from sheryl jie jie thanks so much..muakz juz for sheryl jie jie...she make me happy and seeing her making me feel "wah this jie jie so nice" ^_^


i will keep on praying for all of the one beside me and other ppl that i dun even know them too ^^...so happy can make new fren and the seniors are so frenly...weeehaaaa so happy...kyaaaaaaa!chak see ya later haha...


BELOW WAS MY EDITED POST...AT NIGHT AROUND 7PM(I THINK)
another unexpected thing happen another guys that i din expect to even say a hi to me...ask me about youth conference..i think there is only one guys i haven talk to that i make him mad once..haiz but i already okay with the other guy who i make them mad hehe...so happy...my prayer has reach the GOD i am so happy...

emmm....*blush*

aimmm today was great haha...know what a famous guy called me and ask for something only on some purpose la.. T.T so sad he isn call me asking "hi how are u?have u eat?" haha thats like my ahem ahem or something..yeah that was unexpected..so i chat with him for some minutes..


and then today games was fun and ahem..i think of a stupid thing..know what i recently know a girl named shelly and she was gorgeously then pretty and cute girl ever i saw..she was..i duno how to put it in word..she was frenly,well she add me in msn..and then start to chat(hehe i am the kind of person who will start chatting even its a strangers,oh ya except indian boys bcoz i got a bad nightmare about them..sorry)..


about this girl she once ask me "is ur first kiss still with u?" and i answer "yes..how about u?" she says "no" and i ask while blushing "so........how does it feel?" lol i ask it to a stranger?well she is 16 years old and a girl so i dun mind(but i scare she mind T.T) but anyway i had ask..she answer "hmmm the first time was juicy and ...(i forget jor there is one more word" so i ask "first time?so it was more than once??" she says "three times.." i was like hmmm din need to be so shocked because she is so pretty...


oh ya back to the game...primary skul when hold hands its for something like rule rite?..but now secondary skul..ahem..today play a game that need to hold hand..so actually there is a girl named A and then a guy beside that girl named B on my left hand then my right hand is also a girl so i was selamba jek..


then suddenly the girl on my left hand say "i got work to do" and she left there~~ so i was blur at first and then i think of "OMG i need to hold his hand?" then suddenly my hand tremble..oh no i need to touch his hand..*sweat* actually this was normal but i rarely doing it with guys *sweat* except my family members lar~~...


i was sweating and tremble but i duno did he notice i am trembling?i guess not..fuh...but if he does.....*blush* OMG...so fish la..i know its normal for the active girls..i am active but not until active with guys...they are scary...


oh ya after i back from skul my papa tiba2 said to me about a girl aged 16 (same as me) been kidnapped and killled and then her parents need to pay 60000 not yen la..in Ringgit Malaysia..hmmm in my own opinion if i am been kidnapped and i prefer to juz die..she juz return from her part time job before been kidnapped..then i think my parents will say "haiz less one ppl is more GOOD" ahaha its my own opinion lar~~~or izit true?hahaha...


and then its almost exam..two weeks and three days..*sob*..unfair..i wan go back to kindergarden.. T.T i regret wasting my time in my form 1,2 and 3 T.T...so if u were form 3 and lower please study hard..but if ur parents are rich then i guess u can do it NORMALLY..lol..whatever..


so finally wish the Youth Conference berjalan dengan lancar lerrr...i really look forward to it..last year i din join in but this year i will try my best to join in..

gulp gulp...huarrrrr *pup*(fall to my bed)

hmmmm really tired of the relationship between frens,teachers,companions,companion,that human....yikes...ewwww....kyaa....really stress but not stress out...later will be stress in...these day he is sad and i was better than sad...i would never happy with my skul fren but i cant find anyone(he/she) who can be my best fren..i am searching for someone that has mutual interest like me and only turn to me when anything happen...


i trust i can find him/her but later...i hope i cn find him/her A.S.A.P...if its a gurl then best fren la if guy mayb best fren/ahem ahem lar~~~...


ewww ya lately he is sad..i dunno why he is somekind cold..few weeks ago i was sad and unhappy and trying to be only fren with my best fren(its a success) i finally cn be fren with them and not bestfren coz they belong to each other i am juz an outsider...


two weeks ago i was very silent and he was happy..he ask me "hey kah yan why u so silent?..its not normal leh.." hmmm what the....what izit??u mean i was noisy when normal??yeah i guess so...


hmmm i stay alone..i can do anything alone...except for oral la...it needs pair work *faint*..i prefer alone but i hate ppl say me alone..i will whack that person no matter girl or guy include the so called normal fren..except its my family&junior(budak kecik)..i learn to not get angry no matter what they do...haiz...i hope its a success...


that day(i think its last week when my mood going up) i go to his place when physic and TRY to invite him to youth conference by saying "halo halo hmmm are u feeling sick or something??" but he was like "huh........?" with a scary look...so i said "uhhh....nth..." really scary...


hmmm i was really angry with the indian guy perdagangan...they are pervert...i use this word to describe them they are really PERVERT..well chinese guys is better at least all chinese guys i know from science,prinsip akaun and perdagangan class is nice..some of them maybe like to say bad thing but they wouldn act badly..those indians act and say too..worse!i am really fired up..wanna kick,punch and whack them!


hump..these day feeling down..because i choose to be normal fren with the two girls that i like so much(i means from the aspect of fren)..but then i feel as if i am an outsider so i choose to let go..this happen every year for me..i am juz like a volcano..the magma inside this volcano is made by my jealous and hate feeling..


form 1 i want yin ger and my rival is shu wen...suan liao lor...
form 2 i want hui ying and my rival is fui yen..suan but now i really dun wan she jor...keterlaluan la..
form 3 i want chai jing and my rival is fui yen(again?)..but now i also dun wan jor...
form 4 i want that person and my rival is that person...now still hurt...

i wonder who i want and who is my rival nex year..staying alone is nice after all..u can do thing alone and have peace...sometimes its like..hmmm see the example below...

A like B but B like C and C like A...so its a triangle right?
A like B and C like B..so its an angle right?
A like B,B like A and C like B..so this is stupid right?

lol...i was the C..tepuk tangan sebelah tidak akan ada bunyi..i am a person that bored easily..like i want that person but later i get bored...so it suit me that i am alone..i will be fren with my dark and bright side(or maybe the bright side never exist ahaha)..


chak cya...
take care...
sTaY h@PpY
-k@ReN-